Ampersand

BU, please coax the nice folks at Buildings ‘ Grounds to repair the broken blue emergency phones. We here at the ol’ Free Press want to stand up for students’ rights. Students have the right to check their voicemail from anywhere on campus. When blue phones are broken in places such as South Campus students expecting messages are deprived of quick and easy voicemail access.

The Student Union Safety study also found that the blue phone at Loretto Hall hung out of its socket and wasn’t functional in any way, shape or form. However, officials don’t need to kill themselves in haste to fix this blue emergency phone because students living in Loretto Hall have off-campus phone numbers and since they have a different system to take messages for them, they can’t access their voicemail from these boxes.

And everybody knows that in the grand scheme that is Boston University these poor bastards in Loretto don’t matter too much. They are shoved into some dorm on the Emmanuel College campus that is at least 15 minutes away like criminals sent to Australia by mother England. There are even bars on the windows! At this point, blue emergency phones are the least of these kids’ problems.

According to the experts with the green jackets who lead around eager pre-frosh and their safety concerned parents, one can spot a blue light emergency phone if you spin around 360 degrees from any point on campus. I don’t know if people on the tour try it, all that spinning makes people very dizzy; add this to the nausea induced by information about tuition costs, and parents aren’t interested in spotting anything but a toilet and some sort of weapon.

So B’G, fix the blue phones with haste. Students shouldn’t have to hesitate to get their voicemail, or waste their cell phone minutes calling an on-campus friend for dinner.