Columns, Opinion

HOFBERG: Creep it Real

I used to really love Halloween.

And not just for the pillowcases full of mini Snickers bars and Caramel Apple Lollipops after an excessively long night of trick-or-treating. Although I’d be lying if I said that wasn’t part of what I loved about it.

But, actually, what I used to really love about Halloween was the spookiness of it all.

The fright.

The fear.

The freaky.

Do you remember when once upon a time, Halloween used to be scary?

I do. But only vaguely.

Sadly, it seems to me that every year, we get so caught up in the costumes and candy that have become a hallmark of the Halloween holiday and we lose touch of the true meaning of Halloween. Kind of like how every year, we seem to forget that Christmas isn’t just about presents and reindeer. Now that Halloween is a holiday defined by sexy cop and nun costumes, it’s no wonder that many of us don’t know about the holiday’s haunting history. Despite its dark origins, today, sadly, Halloween is a celebration less about evil, devil worship, satanic forces and the occult and more about who can come up with the sluttiest version of a cat costume.

I’m just curious. How many of you know that the real Halloween evolved from a pagan festival called Samhain celebrated by the Celtic people more than 2,000 years ago?

It’s true.

Halloween, or Samhain as it used to be called, was celebrated in the United Kingdom, Ireland and northwestern France as far back as 5 B.C. and took place on Nov. 1, which was, at that time, considered the first day of the year. And on the eve of the New Year, Oct. 31, the Celts celebrated Samhain, the day when it was believed that ghosts of the dead returned to earth. During the Samhain celebration, people used to wear costumes, typically made out of animal heads and skins, and dance around a sacred bonfire to scare off the bad spirits.

A couple of hundred years later, when immigrants made the move to America during the colonial era, they brought with them the traditions of their pagan customs. Although the celebration of Halloween was not very popular in the colonies because of the rigid Protestant belief systems that were already in place in New England, a distinctly American version of Halloween did begin to emerge. By the middle of the nineteenth century, Halloween festivities had evolved to include the telling of ghost stories and mischief making. It wasn’t until the 1930s that Halloween had become a fully secular holiday that had lost most of its superstitious and religious overtones.

Today Halloween, one of the world’s oldest holidays, is celebrated by more people than ever before and is America’s second largest commercial holiday after Christmas.

In fact, according to the National Retail Foundation Halloween Consumer Spending Survey published by Proper Insights & Analytics in September, total spending on Halloween this year will reach $7.4 billion, and $2.8 billion of that will be spent on costumes. And believe it or not, adults will spend more on their costumes than children. This year, the 75 million adults that dress up will spend about $1.4 billion dollars on their costumes, where only $1.1 billion will be spent on children’s costumes. The remainder, believe it or not, is spent on costumes for pets. That’s a scary amount of money.

But perhaps what’s more frightening to me about the astronomical amount of money that we are spending on Halloween costumes is how much money we’re spending on costumes that seem to get smaller and shorter and skimpier every year. Not to mention, less and less scary and true to the traditional spirit of Celtic Halloween. This year, Americans will spend, according to the NRF survey, an average of $77 dollars on costumes that are mostly only chilling and creepy in cost.

It’s not really news that these days, if your costume isn’t paired with thigh-high fishnets and chunky clear heels, you might as well forget about dressing up at all. I’m not even kidding when I say that for $60, you can buy your very own sexy corn on the cob or carrot costume on Amazon. Can someone please explain to me the appeal of the sexy vegetable costume?

And ladies, you aren’t the only ones guilty of sexing up the holiday. Increasingly, men are sexing up their costumes too by going shirtless and pantless. Tasteless.

Listen. It’s not to say that I’m totally against showing a little bit of leg on Halloween. It is, after all, the one day a year where it’s acceptable to push the envelope and get a little bit raunchy. But what I used to love most about Halloween was the macabre spirit of the holiday.

What happened to all the blood and gore of Halloween? What happened to the spookiness and the spiders? When did it stop being cool to dress up as an evil witch and not a sexy one? Where’s all the fake blood and severed limbs? If the Celts only knew what Halloween has become, I’m sure they’d be rolling in their graves.

Let’s keep it real, you guys. I need you to start bringing evil back, not only for the sake of saving me from having to answer the door for one more brutally unoriginal and unnecessarily sexualized costume, but also, to revive the haunting and historical traditions of Halloween. I know it’s a lot to ask to drop the hemline of your naughty nurse miniskirt, but somehow, I think you’ll live.

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