Ampersand

Class registration begins this weekend for many Boston University students, but we here at the ol’ Free Press aren’t sweating over our options.

We’ve got a sweet schedule all picked out.

When we saw Introduction to Tomfoolery in the University Class Schedule, we nearly fell out of our chairs. It might be at 9 a.m., but, hey, brushing up on one’s shenanigans is quite possibly the best way to get the juices flowing in the morning.

Since we still need to complete our chemistry requirement (some of us don’t have the benefit of being in the College of Optional Math), we opted for Beer-tasting 213, also known as “The Power Hour.”

Another option to fulfill a science lab requirement is Astrology taught by Linda C. Black, a visiting professor from Tribune Media Services.

After such strenuous activity, it’s a great feeling to just sit in the back of a lecture and fall asleep without fear of missing anything important. Our dreams for a good blow-off class came true when President George Bush signed on to teach Current National Issues. Maybe we can get some shut-eye while he rambles on about former Yugoslavian President “Bob” Milosevic.

We figured since we were already committed to taking a class taught by the most powerful man in the country, we ought to sign up for his right hand man’s class.

Yes sir, Vice President Dick Cheney’s here, too. Hopefully, he’ll make it through the entire semester of his Introduction to Cardiology class.

Since we’re running short on credits and really need to get in shape, we decided to pencil a phys. ed. class into our schedule.

If The Kama Sutra in Practice doesn’t get our hearts racing, what will?

Oh, by the way, do you still have the notes for the ethics class you took last semester? We could use them.