Relatives of drunk driving victims lit candles for their lost loved ones last night at a vigil at King’s Chapel in downtown Boston.
“A vigil is a time to remember, a time to share and a time to heal,” said Matt Shedd, the president of Mothers Against Drunk Driving Massachusetts, which sponsored the event.
“Victims come in all sizes and differing needs,” Shedd said. “Some victims are financially stable, but emotionally unstable.”
Some victims need help for a long time, he added.
“MADD is there to provide support for as long as they need it,” Shedd said.
Rev. Daniel Kanter of King’s Chapel offered a prayer to “continue to turn surviving into compassion and wisdom,” and Rabbi Ari Shapiro spoke about healing.
The purpose of the vigil was to work together to resolve and tend grieving hearts.
“Something we can all bear is a shoulder to cry on,” said Millie Webb, MADD’s national president.
Like many of the other speakers’ relatives, one of Shedd’s children died because of drunk driving. Ten years ago, his daughter Hillary was killed.
“Every day I cry — just a little,” Shedd said.
Webb described the day her family was affected by drunk driving. That day she and her family — her husband, 4-year-old daughter Laurie, nephew Mitch and unborn child — were driving home from picking peaches. The man that hit them in 1971 had a .08 blood alcohol content, which at that time was not considered legally drunk.
“Upon impact, the car was engulfed in flames,” Webb said.
Her husband, Roy, who tried to rescue their daughter and nephew, suffered burns to 45 percent of his body. Webb suffered burns and a broken neck. Mitch and Laurie died a few weeks after the crash.
The day of the accident, Laurie was supposed to visit her grandparents but told them, “I better not stay with you tonight or else my mommy and daddy might be lonesome.”
Webb cannot forget her daughter’s last words.
“I was burned so badly, I couldn’t raise my hand to wipe my tears,” Webb said.
Now, Webb sees her scars in a different light.
“My scars are resilience and rebirth,” Webb said. “Life will never be the same. My prayer to you is to enjoy life again.”
The time for lighting candles allowed the attendees to light one in honor of their beloved who were killed by drunk drivers. Many came in remembrance, while others came to show support.
“A year ago, my brother [Jerrard A. Kyricos] was killed — June 5, 54 years old,” said Janet Kyricos Marcous, 53, of Malden. “I was really glad I got this invitation. It is a very lonely experience grieving for someone who has been killed. It is unlike anything I have experienced in terms of loss. Being here is hopefully a connection.”
“I’m here to support my wife, Janet. I too feel the loneliness of grieving for my brother-in-law,” said 53-year-old Charles Marcous.
Shedd offered various solutions through the legal system to curb alcohol-related deaths that to him are “no-brainers.” He advocated zero tolerance for underage drinking, a mandatory seat belt law and making it a crime to have a .08 blood alcohol content.
Webb also discussed the proposed Trust Fund Bill. This will give an extra surcharge to victims by having first time drunk driving offenders pay $25, second time offenders pay $50 and third time offenders pay $100 at the time of their license renewal.
“MADD is devoted to the arrest, prosecution and incarceration of habitual drunk drivers,” said Mary Ellen Manning of the Governor’s Council.
The Governor’s Council provides final approval on judges and is working at “exposing those judges that are too lenient on habitual drunk driving,” Manning said.
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