Large Beers and Lattes: Who would ever pick Rocco Baldelli?

Guess what? It’s time for baseball.

Season after season, fans all across America look forward to compiling their own team of stars in anticipation of the big leaguers lacing up their spikes and taking the field. It’s not just baseball season anymore; it’s also time for fantasy baseball.

This season, the charter members (including myself) of the Boston University Fantasy Baseball League decided that it was time to shut off the computer and meet in person to conduct our draft. After years of reading espn.com’s ‘The Sports Guy’ and his blow-by-blow descriptions of his live drafts, we figured it was time to give it a shot and have a little fun.

Before I get started, let it be known that even though this draft was in the works a month and a half before the season started, trying to get ten people to agree on a day and time can be like trying to get Ted Williams’ kids to agree on what they should do with Dad’s head.

So finally, this past Sunday morning, 10 hung-over souls armed with Gatorade (to replace lost electrolytes) and Munchkins got out of bed and convened in the College of Communication for our first ever live draft. And so to complete the Bill Simmons rip-off, here is the account from this year’s live BU Fantasy Draft.

11:20 a.m. – Bleary-eyed and unkempt, my roommate Dan and I arrive at room 311 in COM. I contemplate taking off my belt and raising it over my head as I walk in, as I’ve taken home the title the last two years. I think better of it coming to the conclusion that I shouldn’t make any enemies before the season begins. Walking in, we draw numbers out of a hat for draft position. The last two years, I picked 10th. This year I draw position No. 9. Close enough. I shall rule again.

11:25 – The three remaining participants show up together and my other roommate Adam, who is acting as commissioner, goes over the ground rules of the league. Just before the start of the draft, Ari, among the last to arrive, asks if anyone has an extra guide available that he can use. With that, Ari immediately eliminated himself from contention.

11:27 – Daily Free Press men’s basketball beat writer Ryan Canner O’Mealy makes Alex Rodriguez the first pick. I suggest to the commish that we keep a running log of the picks up on the dry erase board. He agrees and begins to log all teams up on the board, only he forgets that if you write on the board in a Sharpie pen, it won’t come off. The destruction of the COM building has begun.

11:48 – The lone Yankee fan in the group, a kid we like to call ‘O-Train,’ selects Derek Jeter with his third pick. Coupled with his second round pick Jason Giambi, the construction of the Evil Empire has begun. He later selects Hideki Matsui, Jose Contreras and Don Mattingly, whom he later kicks off his team for refusing to shave his sideburns.

12:03 p.m. – Brian comments that none of the ‘sideways hat gang’ has been selected yet. With the next pick, Ari selects Preston Wilson. Jimmy Rollins and Juan Pierre can’t be far behind.

12:05 – Hillsdon selects Luis Gonzalez with his seventh round pick. The only problem is it isn’t his turn. Adam, picking in front of him, selects Luis Gonzalez. He later notifies me that he was planning on taking Torii Hunter with that pick until Hillsdon’s blunder. ‘I just did it to piss him off,’ he tells me. Hillsdon tells me that he ‘tricked Adam into taking Gonzalez so I could jump on Andruw Jones.’ I don’t know who to believe. I’m confused.

12:21 – I take Jimmy Rollins in the 10th round then head to the bathroom. Upon my return I see that someone has taken Phil ‘Please re-attach my left arm’ Nevin, who is out for the season. I am then informed that an eerie silence filled the room with that selection. ‘Too bad I wasn’t in here,’ I reply.

12:28 – Hillsdon selects his second catcher of the day, Ivan Rodriguez in the 12th round, two picks before I plan to take him. ‘I’m going to use him for defensive purposes,’ he explains. (This in a league with no defensive statistics. I love sarcasm.)

12:31 – Dan selects 38-year-old Ellis Burks to which Ryan replies, ‘Was Mike Greenwell not available?’

12:47 – Dan, dissatisfied with his team thus far, begins the obligatory ‘I’m just going to take every crappy player from my favorite team’ stage of the draft. Good luck with Shea and Wake, Dan.

12:50 – ‘I know he looks like a slab of leather, but I’ll take Benito Santiago.’ You know how they say dogs begin to look like their owners after a while? It appears Benito resembles his catcher’s mitt more and more each year.

1:03 – Dan goes over his allotted time of one and half minutes to make his selection allowing three people to jump in and make their picks before he settles upon Kevin Millar. Kevin, go ahead and join the rest of the second rate Red Sox already selected.

1:10 – Ari asks if Roy Halladay is still on the board to which I reply, ‘I took him an hour and a half ago.’

1:14 – It’s time for the unknown pick of the draft as Dan continues his decent into the doldrums of the league selecting Rocco Baldelli of Tampa Bay. No one even knows who the guy is until Gardner speaks up by saying he wanted to grab him late. ‘I went to high school with the guy.’

1:22 – Ari takes Elmer Dessens and butchers the pronunciation of his last name. New rule for next year: You can’t take a guy if you can’t say his name.

1:32 – The draft ends and everyone takes a look at the big board. As always there are a few favorites but unlike last year, most people can’t agree on a clear favorite. On paper, the league looks very competitive. You may notice that I only mentioned nine of the ten participants in the draft. That’s because the 10th, Steve, went about his business quietly building one of the better teams in the league while the rest of us fooled around.

4:40 p.m. the following day – The Mets lose 15-2 to the Cubs on ESPN, trimming the Phillies magic number to 161. Tom Glavine is a secret double agent still collecting checks from Ted Turner. It’s gonna be a long season. Welcome back, baseball.