KILROY: Getting to Geneva

But before I go any further, let me take a minute and make sure that you read the name of the town correctly. Geneva, Ill., not Geneva, Switzerland, not Geneva, Wis. Geneva, Ill. And since I’m probably talking to a bunch of New Englanders, I should add that Illinois is a state east of the Mississippi, west of the Appalachians.

OK, now that we’ve got that settled, let’s attack this from a local context. Geneva is a small town roughly an hour outside of Chicago. It forms part of the Tri-City area with Batavia to the south and St. Charles to the north. The reason I’m mentioning those two is that most Chicagoland people have heard of Batavia and St. Charles, not Geneva. I don’t know what to say to those people other than what the heck do you mean you’ve never heard of a random town with absolutely no defining characteristics in the middle of suburban Chicago?

Anyway, don’t get me wrong. Geneva has had its 10 minutes of fame. About three years ago Ellen DeGeneres encouraged viewers to enter into a “Best Town” contest with the winner receiving a visit from DeGeneres herself. Well Geneva didn’t win, but it did come in second, warranting a visit from DeGeneres’s assistant and camera crew . . . or maybe it was her DJ? Anyway, DeGeneres decided it was best to live the experience secondhand. Hmm.

Then again, there are parts of the town that I do miss when I’m away. We have a quaint downtown district with old Victorian homes, antique stores, and dessert shops. The best part of the downtown area, however, has to be the south end of Third Street, which features the Geneva Train Station. Each hour, Metra riders can take the Union Pacific/West Line 35 miles east towards civilization – Chicago. Kidding.
Come to think of it, though, the majority of my free time (when I’m not working – fingers crossed I have a job) will most likely be spent somewhere else. Yes, each summer I find myself sharing sidewalk space with preteen mall rats at a place called “The Commons.” Now, you Bostonians probably think “The Commons” is a collection of grassy knolls inhabited with picnicking couples and curious tourists. Please, if you find such a place in Geneva let me know, because I want to go there.

No. The Commons is a sort of watering hole for people whose pockets are burning with cash – Coach, Sephora, Pottery Barn. You get the idea. Frankly, I don’t think I’m quite ready to spend another summer loitering around there. So what will I do with my time instead?

Well, I could go to the gym. I have gotten into the routine of going to FitRec at least five times a week this semester. Perhaps that will carry over at home? Wow, who am I kidding? It won’t.

But let’s say that I do go to the gym at home. Well, I am most likely going to be accompanied by middle-aged men and women who are probably in better shape than I am.

In what universe is this fair? I’m not saying that I’m going to be the most out of shape person there, but the handful of women with waists thinner than mine and are in their third or fourth class of the day (at least that’s what they’re telling their tan and toned friends) makes me feel like crap.

So forget the gym. Heck, forget everything said because I know where I’ll be spending most of my free time – on the couch catching up on all of the television that I missed because I lived in room without a television for eight months.

Ah, well, at least I have the 16-hour ride home as a buffer. Sixteen hours seems to be the perfect amount of time to wipe the tears from my face while the scenery changes from rolling New England hillsides to the ol’ plains of plenty.

Oh, Geneva. Here’s to the summer of 2012.

Meaghan Kilroy is a sophomore in the College of Communication and a weekly columnist for The Daily Free Press. She can be reached at  kilroymeg@hotmail.com.