Yes, that’s right, I’m employed for this upcoming summer — exciting!
“Congratulations, Sophí,” as my mom would say.
On a real note, though, applying for internships for the summer made me want to rip my hair out. I don’t think I’m alone in that sentiment. To anyone who had to deal with a brutal internship application cycle, my warmest regards.
It objectively sucks.
Part of it is because of the sheer amount of work that goes into an application — which unfortunately may immediately end up being thrown in the trash. I have spent so many hours perfecting my materials only for them to get brushed aside and ignored.
Frankly, selecting an internship also felt like such a permanent, life-altering choice in terms of career stuff. 20 years of life still doesn’t feel like enough for me to know exactly what I want to do with the next 60.
But everyone makes it seem like if you don’t get an internship, that death is imminent and that it will come in a fiery, painful manner. Well, that’s an exaggeration, but people do say that it’s not the best career move.
In January, I realized that I was accidentally setting myself up for an internship-less summer. I started thinking about what my summer would look like without a job.
I didn’t love what it was like last summer. My parents didn’t, either. Last year, my dad texted my mom out of concern due to the rate at which I was consuming “Sex and the City.”
Admittedly, it wasn’t my most productive summer. I was worried about letting them down for the second year in a row.
Up went my LinkedIn, and down went my shame.
I spam texted all my friends, begging for resume and internship advice. In a panic, I wrote some really terrible cover letters and sent them to companies which I predictably never heard back from.
I applied for everything under the sun — publishing companies, art museums, law firms — you name it. I tried to imagine myself in fancy clothes, with a planner and a cup of coffee at every company I sent my materials to.
It was scary — getting rejections, cryptic post-interview emails and hearing other people score their top internships.
The deeper into the semester I got, the more nervous I became of spending my summer rewatching “Sex and the City.”
I also got nervous that I was picking all the wrong things.
What if I hated what I was doing? I was taking a new, big step into my adult life, and I was worried I was making a mistake — that I would end up sitting at a desk ten years from now, regretting the things I chose to do when I was just beginning to understand adulthood.
That’s when I started to think about what I actually, truly enjoy. Part of the problem was that I spent much of my time thinking about what would look good on a resume. I applied for jobs that truly weren’t suited to me — and that, I feel, is the most important thing to consider.
I thought about what I loved. I looked at all the women I admire who are exceeding in their fields of choice and realized that their success is a result of their passion.
I couldn’t force myself to love things that I couldn’t stand.
Once I started applying to more niche things that I knew I would truly enjoy, I found success.
It was no use in writing a cover letter chock full of lies. No, I wasn’t that thrilled to submit my application to a company I had never heard of before, and no, I didn’t think it would be easy for me to find housing in a city I’d never explored before.
Once the cover letters were for things I actually cared about, they became much more fun to write, and much more exciting to submit.
I’m happy to share that I have two internships for this summer that I am thrilled to work on. If it weren’t for my change in heart, I probably would have been shrugging about my summer — maybe even harrumphing, diving into the depths of a “Sex and the City” rewatch.
From now on, I’m leading with passion and looking for opportunities that bring me joy. And ultimately, that’s what I should be spending my life doing.
Say goodbye to the panicked version of me, searching for something I don’t want, and say hello to a girl who has a thing or two to say on joyful employment.
