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Muse guides a couch potato’s Halloween

With few tricks and numerous treats, tonight’s primetime lineup offers plenty of laughs along with a fair share of boos. Whether you’re looking for something merry or morbid, you’ll find it in the following list of hits.

ABC 9 p.m. – “Monk” An obsessive-compulsive detective Adrian Monk (Tony Shalhoub) masterminds the investigation of a suspicious murder of a politician’s bodyguard. If the very idea of a mentally ill detective doesn’t scare you, tune in and see if Monk should have stayed in retirement instead of re-joining the force.

NBC 8 p.m. – “Friends” Everybody’s favorite sitcom brings few spooks, but many laughs in an all-new episode. Rachel (Jennifer Aniston) frets over leaving her newborn baby with a babysitter for a long-awaited and richly deserved night out. Eternally hungry Joey (Matt LeBlanc) and birthday girl Phoebe (Lisa Kudrow) fight for a table in a restaurant, while Monica (Courtney Cox Arquette) fumes over Chandler’s (Matthew Perry) attempts to resume smoking.

9 p.m. – “Will ‘ Grace” Scarier than a sober Karen (Megan Mullally), the Halloween episode of ABC’s controversial yet hilarious sitcom transforms urban girl Grace into an outdoorsy type — well, almost. In an attempt to impress her new beau (guest star Harry Connick, Jr.,) Grace consents to a spooky bike ride along with Will (Eric McCormack) and his new friend (guest star Jason Marsden). Watch out for sparks!

9:30 p.m. – “Good Morning Miami” In the spirit of a Shakespeare comedy, Jake (Mark Feuerstein) and Dylan (Ashley Williams) share their first kiss unsuspecting of each other’s identities. How, you ask. Easy – put a bunch of masked and costumed coworkers in a tight space, add some liquor, call it a Halloween party, and see what happens.

10 p.m. – “ER” Although one might argue that after the shocks of the season premiere — Dr. Romano’s (Paul McCrane) airborne arm, for example — few surprises will force a jaded couch potato to sit upright, tonight’s episode of the distinguished drama proves that it still has teeth. A frustrated Dr. Corday fights flesh-eating bacteria, while a new member of the staff (guest star Don Cheadle) battles a rare physical handicap. On the bright side, Abby (Maura Tierney) and Dr. Carter (Noah Wyle) light each other’s fires.

FOX 8:30 p.m. – “The Simpsons: Treehouse of Horror III” The peaceful lives of Springfield are disrupted in tonight’s hellacious episode. Evil genius Bart unleashes an army of zombies with an incantation, while Krusty the Clown haunts the town. Or could it be a vicious doll trying to ruin his reputation in the spirit of Sideshow Bob? Tune in to find out.

THE WB 8 p.m. – Family Affair An old-school British butler, Mr. French (Tim Curry) knows precisely how many times to stir the perfect cocktail and just how far to roll his eyes at an uncultured ruffian. Unfortunately, he does not know how to cope with two 6-year-old twins and their 14-year-old sister. In tonight’s Halloween episode, Mr. French takes the twins out for an expedition full of creepy, crawly fun.

8:30p.m. – “Do Over…” Be careful what you wish for (unless it’s a brand-new silver Audi, of course). In this sitcom, a 34-year-old paper salesman (read: sore loser) Joel Larsen (Penn Badgley) gets propelled 20 years back in time until he is a freshman in high school. As if the plot line itself didn’t merit the most terrifying Halloween horror, tonight’s episode gives the protagonist a second chance at the perfect first kiss. Hello Listerine, sweat and acne!

9 p.m. – “JKX” He’s the guy you’d love to be friends with, just as long as you don’t get on his bad side. Jamie Kennedy, the prankster who knows no bounds, presents another episode full of antics that combine the surprise factor of “Candid Camera” with the provocative tendencies of “SpyTV.” In tonight’s episode Jamie hosts a party at which he teaches his fellow trick-or-treaters the finer points of coercing sweets out of unsuspecting neighbors. Tune in and see if things get illegal.

9:30 p.m. – “Off Centre” Providing endless slices of “American Pie”-type humor that becomes legend at frat parties, this sitcom about two New York pals — the all-American Mike and the Brit Euan — recounts the woeful tales of getting laid in the Big Apple. In tonight’s episode, the pals decide to switch accents to meet girls at a Halloween party. See for yourself if it works.

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One Comment

  1. – She’s so cute! I love her little updo! I wish my girls hair was long egunoh to do something like that! Such a cute costume, I can see why she wants to wear it:)