Family and friends of Jai Menon, the freshman who died March 30 at Kilachand Hall, gathered Sunday afternoon at a service held on the ground floor lounge of the Yawkey Center for Student Services.
On behalf of the Boston University administration, Dean of Marsh Chapel Robert Hill welcomed the Menon family and a group of approximately 30 attendees.
“Our time together is one of grieving and of remembering and of accepting and affirming,” Hill said in his greeting. “We are living the ongoing work of … grieving the loss of a loved one. We are beginning to accept the separation that comes with physical death.”
The Menons traveled from their hometown of Briarcliff Manor, New York to attend the service. During the service, Girish Menon, Jai Menon’s father, recounted the family’s memories of his deceased son and thanked attendees for their kindness. His son was a student in BU’s College of Arts and Sciences.
“We do not have any answer,” Menon, 50, said. “We do not know how we’ll find those answers, but this is the time to heal and celebrate. We miss him dearly every minute, every second, every day.”
Menon said his son, who had a habit for traveling and going to the beach, truly wanted to attend BU and had made close friends.
“Even though he was strong, he was a gentle soul, as you heard from his friends as well,” Girish Menon said, referring to his son’s early start in karate.
“Jai, your life was a blessing. Your memory, your love, your words are missed,” Girish Menon tearfully continued.
A number of Jai Menon’s friends from BU also shared their memories of their deceased peer.
Christopher Seto, a freshman in the College of Engineering, described his friendship with Menon as “ridiculous.” Seto said he first met Menon in September 2015 at Splash, an annual event to showcase various BU student groups.
“Looking back, Jai was very, very passionate about so many things,” Seto recalled. “Thinking of everything we’ve done — the hours of movies and TV, hanging out and playing ‘Smash Brothers’ — it’s hard to believe that all that fit into a single seven-month block. I feel like I’ve known him my entire life.”
Cooper Kotzan, a freshman in CAS, said she remembers Menon as opinionated yet considerate. Kotzan, who said she had planned to live off-campus with Menon and other friends, became friends with him two months ago.
“The Jai that I did know was an absolute nerd,” Kotzan said. “He cared for what his friends had to say and actually listened … The quality of his character and the connections he made mattered the most to him. He was a kind soul, whom I’m incredibly thankful for as part of my life.”
Melissa Tomashek, a freshman in CAS, described Menon’s presence as “comforting.” She said she first met him in January, when they started working together at Mugar Memorial Library.
“I could talk to him with anything I felt like, just after a month,” Tomashek said, recollecting her 20-minute conversation with Menon about various types of bugs during one of their four-hour shifts.
“He’d always wait for me right in front of the security, swipe through and say ‘good night’ to me,” she said. “It’s just weird not having him here.”
No information of Menon’s cause of death was shared during the service. According to his death certificate, obtained by The Daily Free Press on April 7, the cause of death is still under investigation.
After words of consolation from Lawrence Whitney, Marsh Chapel’s university chaplain for community life, attendees convened on the sixth floor of Yawkey for a reception. Several attendees spoke of their memories of Menon and voiced appreciation of the service.
Divya Gopinath, a freshman at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology, said she grew up with Menon, and her favorite memories of him were their annual Thanksgiving celebrations when they played the game Clue with friends and relatives.
“Every year, Jai and I would try to cheat,” Gopinath said, “and it’s become a recurring theme every year that we’d come up with a new way to cheat and win Clue, even though we were playing with people three years younger than us.”
Teresa Indriolo, 20, of Pleasantville, New York, said she knew Menon from the Bushido School of Karate. She expressed her gratitude for Menon, who had trained her little brother.
“My little brother couldn’t fight, and Menon pushed him to the bone,” Indriolo said. “[Menon] was a great student, and he gave that to others … He brought his happiness that everybody talked about at Bushido.”
Emily Carson, a freshman in the College of Communication, reminisced about her weekly dinners with Jai and his friend, Chris, which would extend to as long as two hours.
“We’d just talk about anything and everything,” Carson said. “He’ll be dearly missed. He was a great friend, and he was an awesome person to be around with. It’s been really hard with him gone, but he’s in a better place.”
