DEPIES: An ode to catcallers

It had been two days since I’d showered.

For some reason, I thought this factoid would assist me as I walked toward my dorm and right past a guy catcalling every girl who passed him. However, as I watched him wolf-whistle and then yell at a young woman jogging in the opposite direction, I realized my slightly greasy state would probably not be a deterrent.

My last hope as I lowered my eyes and quickened my pace was that this creep would already be satisfied by his previous comments and would feel no need to harass another person. But I guess when a man’s primary interaction with women involve discomforting, unwanted comments toward their appearance, he’s never satisfied.

He was about to get into his car when he looked up and said “Oh hey, how you doin’?” Yes, it does sound contrived, doesn’t it?

The jogger had just passed us; his infidelity was absolutely shocking. When I didn’t respond, he said something about how he just wanted me to smile, and why wouldn’t I smile?

Okay random person, do you want to know the first step to making a girl smile? Don’t make degrading comments at her on the street.

I’d like to meet the person who came up with the idea of catcalling. I’d look him (yes, I’m going to assume it’s a man) in the eyes, maybe ask him what he was thinking and then slap him in the face.

I don’t know any woman who appreciates it when men honk and yell out of the windows of their cars as she walks by, nor do I know anyone who feels better about themselves following any similar encounters. I’d call the whole practice outdated, but that would imply that there was some time in history when it was socially acceptable. If I could go back in time to, say, ancient Greece, I’m pretty sure the women there would have similar responses to me.

I do believe there’s a right way to compliment someone you don’t know. It would involve approaching the person face-to-face, respectfully asking for his or her attention, and then speaking. However, I’m not sure how this plan would work for the normal catcalling man.

“Excuse me Miss, I just wanted to stop you for a moment to say you really work it in those jeans,” the gentleman in question would say, possibly with a tip of his top hat and a slight bow.

As it stands, the men who cat-call aren’t interested in making women’s days better, expressing their love for the opposite gender or even “seeing you smile.” They simply enjoy subjecting innocent people to some twisted power play.

Unfortunately, trying to gain respect by being disrespectful stopped being effective after the sixth grade. All of those pre-teen bullies either grew up or, it seems, turned into man-children who still don’t know how to treat women.

And, as I learned, they’ll treat all women this way — it doesn’t matter how many days you go without showering.

Jessica Depies is a freshman in the College of Communication. She can be reached at jdepies@bu.edu.