Shut up, quit thinking

As a newcomer to the North East, I wanted to offer an alternative perspective on the Bush White House and all of the good that I feel you liberals have overlooked.

For starters, despite common belief, Republicans have helped educate many Americans about geography and international relations–honestly, without Bush, I never would have known that Iraq and Afghanistan are countries, let alone been able to find them on a map! Republicans have also improved my vocabulary dramatically. For instance, since they gained control of congress, I’ve learned such words as: indictment, blame-game, levee, jingoist, blind-faith, category-5, level orange, and impotent. Furthermore, since Bush invaded the White House, I’ve learned that “human being and fish can coexist peacefully” and added to my vocabulary such words as: subliminabable, resignate, exemplarary, and misunderestimated.

I want to thank Bush for setting a good example to students across the nation and holding himself to a high linguistic and academic standard. Our President is a man of conviction who knows “how hard it is for you to put food on your family.” He is even intelligent enough to meet the rigorous standards set by the Texas public high school system: “As governor of Texas, I have set high standards for our public schools, and I have met those standards.” He knows what really matters in politics and in life: “The most important job is not to be Governor, or first lady in my case.” And he does not waste time concentrating on irksome work and reflection: “I’m also not very analytical. You know I don’t spend a lot of time thinking about myself, about why I do things.”

So please leave our President alone! Just shut up, quit thinking and stop asking all of your bothersome questions! Or maybe I should let Bush plead for himself: “I think if you know what you believe, it makes it a lot easier to answer questions. I can’t answer your question.”

Jon Pierre Piron, Jr. noripj@bu.edu (702) 287-8604 CAS, 2007