MAHDI: Royally smitten

Alas, the month of February has crept up stealthily upon us, coupled (excuse the pun) with the dreaded sugarcoated celebration of Valentine’s Day. Cue the ominous theme song from “Jaws.” Volumes of lovey-dovey paraphernalia litter the stores. Chalkboards scream from the sidewalks of deals on flower arrangements that will eventually wilt and die, even with the appropriate care, much like segments of our souls as we are confronted with overindulgent public displays of affection on the T.

Or in the morning line for Starbucks – indulging in one’s undying devotion to caffeine as opposed to a significant other should not be this emotionally taxing.

In keeping with love being in the air this year, there is only one romance that has captured the imagination of the public and transcended international borders. And that is the story of the upcoming nuptials of Prince William and Kate Middleton. It is rare in history that there is one event that appeals to the hearts and minds of millions across the world. It’s a story that divides opinion: you either swoon in romantic ecstasy or hurriedly excuse yourself, gripped with a disenchanted nausea.

Dubbed “Waity Katie” by the bemused British public, her incredible story has been a beacon of hope that has captivated women all over the world. Meet a prince in college, maintain a relationship through intrusive paparazzi scrutiny for more than half a decade, and before you know it you are two degrees away from becoming queen of a nation and the darling of the press. A plot unravels that could potentially be worth millions at the box office. A movie is rumored to be alarmingly close to conception. Uncertainty as to whether Queen Elizabeth II would approve came into play, as whispered speculation further intensified. No one could escape the inevitable parallels drawn between Kate and the late Princess Diana. Her memory rests snugly on Kate’s ring finger, completing all the vital ingredients to allow your everyday monarchical saga to rise to boiling point.

So it came as no surprise when on Nov. 17, 2010, a beaming but coy Prince William and Kate emerged in front of the press to announce their engagement. A tumultuous love story that had stubbornly hogged news space had come to a head. The end was finally in sight of an affair that managed to be even more volatile than the stock market during the economic crisis.

It is extremely rare for any event to have such an impact across the globe, especially one concerning the archaic institution of royalty. Is it the rush of escapism that drives us to develop an obsession with the glamorous occasion? Perhaps in envy we devour every detail and picture we can find just to glimpse an imperfection, a slip that implies that they are human just like the rest of us. But the impact of this wedding extends far further than photo shoots, press releases and potential dress designs.

While the majority of the public may have seen the engagement as a flight from the ugly reality we are confronted with on a daily basis, businesses saw opportunity. In factories thousands of miles away in China, the royal wedding has been a source of enormous profit. The BBC reported that workers toil over thousands of plates to be sold for vast sums of revenue all in honor of the main event. And fair play to them. After all, when an opportunity presents itself as a promise of good business, its only natural to capitalize on the gains.

So where do we draw the line between healthy interest and all-consuming stalking? Do I really need to be told how to get “the Kate” at my closest hair salon? Why does my life have to come to a complete standstill because People.com has a poll on which tiara would look best sitting pretty on Kate’s head? There’s five minutes of my life I’m never getting back. Consider this a warning to save yourselves.

That’s not to say that the wedding is completely lacking in any sort of gravitas. It offers an example of the endurance of a much-publicized love in the light of trying circumstance. It presents rejuvenation for the royal family itself. An ordinary British citizen has penetrated the elite club gates. Kate Middleton has certainly succeeded in catching the attention of the world’s media, and it is up to her what she does with it. Perhaps beyond the big wedding, she’ll be recognized for humanitarian efforts. Maybe she will be admired for her advocacy of issues that matter more to the world than whether she is going to wear one or two wedding dresses in just over two months time. Or her velocity as she strolls downs the aisle seeing as the ridiculous has invaded the realm of the more plausible topics of speculation.

So it seems that men, women and children all over the world have decided to wrap themselves in white veils of their own imagination. This is evidently a departure from the stuffy reputation that has dogged the monarchy for generations. An ideological shift for the masthead of Great Britain reveals an invaluable chance to command global attention. Hopefully, unlike the England soccer team’s humiliating crash out of the World Cup last summer, the royal wedding and its aftermath will continue with much more conviction.