Columns, Opinion

Worlds apart

In today’s society, we exist is separate worlds, sometimes belonging to more than one at a time. It’s easy to say, and ubiquitously heard, that we don’t want to place labels on ourselves, but it’s inevitable. Those stereotypical high school cliques often act as a microcosm for our entire society. It’s as if we are born and immediately thrown into this system of labels and ideals and preconceived notions. We may not address the issue directly, but we do, in fact, live in distant worlds from each other.

It’s not as though I’m saying that these worlds are exclusive or free from immigration, but I merely mean to say we are amicably (usually) separate in practice. Allow me to pull examples from my own life. As a gay guy who isn’t necessary obviously so, I’ve generally had more girl friends, but, also a good amount of guy friends. Despite the fact that I can relate to my guy friends on many levels (sports, music, etc.), there always will exist a wall between us. We come from opposite ends of the social universe, but we never recognize this fact. The conversation ceases whenever it turns to relationships, because how could we ever relate there? How could my relationships ever match a straight one?

And it’s not as though this is meant in a negative way. This is never said, but it just sort of happens naturally. The wall between us instantly blocks some sort of invisible force between us. It’s as though there is a massive Berlin Wall that rests between each of the worlds, except these walls are crossable. I have guy friends, that’s obviously allowed, but our relationships are hindered in a certain sense.

Worlds within worlds even exist. The Lesbian Gay Bisexual Transgender world, for example, carries with it many different subgroups that tend to stay separate from each other. Some are considered “too gay,” or “more gay,” or “straight-acting,” but we all know these labels come from outside sources. The thing is, though, no matter the source of the labels, we become trapped within them. To every rule, of course, there are exceptions, but in today’s society, these outliers are few and far between. Once you pull yourself from one label, you get thrown into the next. Are you an anti-conformist? Well, then that’s your new label. You cannot escape it, and once you placed yourself in a particular world(s), that’s where you live and those are the people with whom you live. You may venture and befriend foreigners, but it is the members of your world where the walls don’t exist.

With so many labels and subgroups and niche cultures in society, the walls and worlds have become smaller and smaller, compromising our everyday relationships. I honestly don’t even believe a single one of my close friends and family exist within my own small world. It’s necessary, though, to look at this societal system and wonder if it needs changing or should remain static. It’s a tough question because these walls are almost untouchable.

We are who we are no matter what, but closer relationships, whether we recognize our limitations or not, would make for a better Earth. Is there a way to break the walls, but maintain the many worlds? Will you tear down your own subconscious walls?

Jake Haungs is a sophomore in the College of Communication and a weekly columnist for The Daily Free Press. He can be reached at jmhaungs@bu.edu.

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