PEARSON: Spring breakdown

I

hope that your spring break was either restful and quiet, or wild and full of debauchery. It’s funny how there are only these two options, and they’re such polar opposites. Of course, the two aren’t mutually exclusive; I spent my days lounging on the beach, while my nights were anything but peaceful. Indeed, Spring Break is probably the most popularized events of the American college experience. MTV has made millions each year on televised programming, and I’m confident that the economies of Cancun and Puerto Rico would not be the same without our purchase of all-you-can-drink vacation packages each year.

And so, I bring you two Spring Break themed questions. From here until the end of the year, the shorts will get shorter; frat parties will spill out onto Ashford St. balconies; and students from Miami will still complain that it’s “still so cold in Boston.” Seniors only have about fifty days until graduation, and their replacements are already touring campus on sunny afternoons.

Flying home from Mexico this week, I was approached by a guy who wanted to join the Mile High Club. I know what that means, but I thought it was illegal or not even possible to do in such a small bathroom. He asked for a handjob under a blanket, and said that if we were quiet, we wouldn’t get into any trouble. Ultimately, I said no, and I think he found some other girl to get him off. Did I do the right thing here? Mile High Club Reject

The allure of the Mile High Club has been around for many years, since the dawn of air travel. As the saying goes, “if there’s a way to have sex in it, with it or around it, people will do it.” The qualifications for membership in the Mile High Club are as follows: Two people must have sex while at an altitude of 5,280 feet (one mile) above ground. Entertaining your self in an airplane lavatory does not count, and I would not advocate bragging about that either.

So, is it legal? Well, that depends on a few factors. Technically, no matter where it occurs, any public sex is illegal. However, in the blanket scenario you mentioned, how could someone prove you were getting him off? Test the blanket for fluids? As long as you were quiet, you could say you were scratching an itch your fellow passenger had on his inner thigh. Now, the bathroom sex issue is a little more complicated. On domestic flights, American laws apply, and thanks to those pesky terrorism laws and regulations, you could be in a mess of legal trouble, including possible jail time!

Finally, a quick word about the quality of lavatory sex: Just because something is possible doesn’t mean it will be fun or sexy.  If your potential Mile High Club partner was hot, MHCR, you could have asked him to meet you at your hotel room later than night. Then, you would have access to more than the 84 inches of space available in an airplane bathroom.

I’m suddenly interested in trying more physical things during sex. I’ve done some Googling, and I think I might be into domination. Over break, I met a girl who indulged me a bit, she slapped me around a few times during foreplay. When I got back to campus, though, I looked up some info, and it looks so dangerous! Things are all black leather, locks and chains. Any tips for safe domination or ideas for where to get some first-time supplies? Barely Dominated, Still Motivated

There is a wide, wide range of kinks in this world, and BDSM is one of the most common, simply because of the range of possibilities. For the uninitiated, BDSM is an acronym for Bondage, Dominance, Sadism and Masochism. The four elements are hugely different, but can be combined together during a session. (Yes, a session, as sometimes the costumes and harnesses prevent real sex from happening at all!)

And these complicated harnesses, swings and whips are what scare most BDSM amateurs away, especially on their first try. So, for a first-timer like yourself, BDSM, take a walk over to Good Vibrations or Condom World, and let them know that you’re in the market for a good beginner’s kit. If sex in small places is your thing, though, I’ll forward you MHCR’s contact info. She may be able to hook you up with something a little tighter

Luke Pearson is a weekly columnist for The Daily Free Press. He can be reached at lpsexquestions@gmail.com.