I winced when I saw the comments the mother of the Tsarneav brothers made last week about the Boston Marathon bombings — how it was all fake and her sons were being framed because they’re Muslim. Oh boy. Really? You really believe that?
The conspiracy theory mentality is absolutely fascinating. How are people able to meekly go about their lives while holding these beliefs? There are millions of U.S. citizens who claim that Bush and Chaney toppled the world trade center. How is that a thing? Can you imagine living in this country thinking your own government arbitrarily murdered a couple thousand of its own people, then used it as propaganda to invade another country … so that gas prices would drop a few cents on the gallon?
These people wake up and go to work. They buy groceries. They bowl on Tuesday nights. They vote. They pay taxes. All the while, thinking the ENTIRE government is a massive network of lies and conspiracy. How could you possibly live here while holding that belief? What are you doing? Your government is plotting your murder! Run! Go! I wouldn’t care if I had to buy a plane ticket, or had to stow away on a cargo boat — whatever. If I believed my country was blowing up it’s own major cities I would be on the next form of transit out.
You’re a farmer in Iowa. Somebody came and messed up a bunch of your corn. Then, they decided, “Hey, I’m gonna turn your cow’s face inside-out now. Just for kicks.” First of all, you’re telling me that you honestly believe that was aliens? Aliens of unfathomable intelligence flew here across the cosmos just so they could screw up your dinky, little farm. Fine. I mean you’re obviously not the type of person who’s going to be swayed by a rational argument, so I won’t waste my time there. But, what the heck are you still doing on that farm? You believe aliens are screwing with you, and you’re just going to keep hanging out in the same place? You’re just going to keep sprinkling corn seeds and laying down fertilizer while little, green men hover around, waiting for the sun to go down so they can kidnap you? Move to Chicago, dude. No UFOs there. Ever.
What about the people in Mississippi who hunt “Bigfoot?” I mean, again, they believe Bigfoot exists. So, I won’t waste time with that. But you believe a giant ape-man of unprecedented strength and agility lives out in the woods, and you’re going to hunt it? That thing would tear you limb from limb! Don’t hunt Bigfoot. C’mon now. You’re lucky it doesn’t exist so it can’t beat the crap out of you.
Do people actually think the U.S. moon landing was staged? Really? Where was the VHS of us winning the Vietnam War? Where’s the Blue Ray of Iraqis constructing a giant statue of Bush in the middle of Baghdad?
People can’t possibly believe this stuff. Can they? Here’s my conspiracy theory: Human beings like to brainwash themselves into believing dizzyingly absurd delusions.
Frank Marasco is a senior in the College of Communication. He can be reached at fcm820@bu.edu.
This is an account occasionally used by the Daily Free Press editors to post archived posts from previous iterations of the site or otherwise for special circumstance publications. See authorship info on the byline at the top of the page.
You forgot to mention the whince-worthy “backlash against Muslim” myth.
Oh, wait… Tenured Boston-U professors still believe that giant ape-man exists.
https://dailyfreepress.com/2013/04/25/allocations-board-releases-clarifying-end-of-year-report/
/gaze
It’s their way of coping with something unfathomable to the average human being. They will over complicate and blame because if they can explain how such terrible things can happen, they will still feel like they are in control. It distracts them from facing their vulnerability as a human being.
Fact is some people do terrible things. There’s no explaining it. It just is.
That’s my conspiracy theory