Op-Ed, Opinion

OP-ED: On the millennial relationship

Millennial thinking has formed a modern-day generation. It has turned us into a progressive group that has resulted in an era of technological innovation, productive thinking and equality that has instilled feminist thinking, enhanced self-expression and freedom. It has turned pushing buttons into touching screens, verbal communication into virtual communication and naive mindsets into well-rounded thinking that has made us more ambitious and innovative than ever.

To the objective eye, millennials aren’t turning our world into a lazy, anti-social generation. They are revolutionizing, moving forward and setting up for a future that will bring something that seems to be missing today — hope.

However, with this new wave of ambition comes an inevitable side effect of selfish thinking that has hindered us from something that we ultimately need — a real relationship.

The wave of equality and mobility has allowed millennials, especially women, a free range to transition their focus from traditional thinking to the ways in which they can turn their goals into reality. With the age of feminism, women are now pressured to prove that we aren’t defined by a relationship, but instead focused on a path of self-sufficiency.

With this, I find myself in an internal struggle to balance my desire to pursue a relationship with my desire to succeed. I am a twenty-something millennial going into my senior year of college with more than four internships under my belt, hoping to move to New York and, ultimately, get a career. I grew up watching “Sex and the City,” taking in the anecdotes of Miranda and Samantha that taught me to find independence and success before settling down for a man.

However, what happens when life throws a curve ball and I find this thing called “love” in my way? What if I find myself, dare I say, thinking like Charlotte, a woman who would sacrifice what I consider important aspects of life for a man?

Being a female college student, I have witnessed the transition of dating culture into hookup culture, iPhones into apps that help us find one night stands and love letters into one-word text messages that make us scared of vulnerability. We refrain from labeling our relationships in fear of getting hurt, yet we are willing to sacrifice everything for a successful career. And, in a time when technology and communication are things we continuously take advantage of, why are we scared to use it in a relationship?

I am slowly coming to the realization that I know what I want. And despite my stance of independence, I have also realized that it’s okay for a millennial college student to admit they want to share a life with someone. Having a successful future shouldn’t be measured by tangible achievements like a nice salary, a respectable job title or a nice address to call home. It should be measured by the capacity to feel fulfilled emotionally — something we often forget comes from sharing our life with someone we love.

Paige Griffiths, pgriff@bu.edu

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One Comment

  1. Oh so funny, i mean that first paragraph where you just pontificate about how wonderful you are.
    What was the rest of the article like? I didn’t read it, I was hospitalized for laughing too hard at the beginning.
    Go outside for once and actually talk.