Columns, Opinion

Our True Face: Interracial dating is difficult, but there’s a silver lining

As the world becomes more global, interracial couples have become more common.  

More than 10 percent of American couples are interracial as of 2016, according to the U.S. Census. In spite of this trend, interracial couples continue to be stigmatized. The media has also been guilty of imposing negative stereotypes on them.

Although progressive societies are becoming more accepting, people’s mentalities change more slowly now — this makes them less likely to accept interracial dating and even discourage it. The societal disapproval can be really discouraging thing for interracial couples.

As a Mexican living in the United States, I have experienced these obstacles firsthand. In my dating life, I have dated both Latino and white men, and both experiences were very different.

First, there is the problem of getting the family to accept you, especially in the case of a white person and POC dating. The white family must accept the ethnic partner and the ethnic family must accept the white partner. Since you may potentially marry into the family, parental approval is a deciding factor. 

Also, cultural differences can strain the relationship because they imply different ways of understanding the world. Things such as which holidays to celebrate, the food and even the way you expect your partner to treat you. Different languages can also pose a problem. It is difficult for the partners who do not speak the same language to communicate, much less with each other’s families. 

Furthermore, if the relationship leads to the birth of a biracial child, the couple may exacerbate the racism they face. The Washington Post  published an article about a white man who was with his darker skinned son at a grocery store. Despite being the biological father, the man was interrogated about his son being his. 

My aunt had a similar experience. She is Mexican and married to a Spaniard. Her daughter is paler than she is and has blue eyes. Many times she has been called the nanny of her own daughter. 

Regardless of the obstacles they face,  interracial relationships can still be beautiful. It is enriching to learn from people who are different from you because they offer alternative perspectives.

An interracial relationship allows you to learn about a culture different from your own and learn more about your own sensibilities.  The need for more transparent communication increases your compassion. It opens your mind and creates something unique that could not be created if both partners had the same background.

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