All throughout my freshman year of college, my mother regularly sent me handwritten letters.
The excitement of receiving mail, discovering the thoughtfully chosen postcard and reading the latest news — probably not so newsworthy anymore, considering how long it took for it to cross the ocean — felt very nostalgic.
It had been years since I’d received or sent any kind of written correspondence. It brought back sweet memories of summer holidays in the South of France, when I’d write postcards to all my friends on the terrace and look forward to the ones I’d receive in my mailbox.
With the rise in popularity of journaling as a tool for personal growth, it would be a stretch to say that our generation has stopped writing altogether — but we do tend to write only for ourselves. As time goes on and exchanging letters is perceived as even more old-fashioned, we may question the gesture and contemplate the act of writing letters to our loved ones.
What if I wrote a three-page letter to this boy, listing all the little things I’ve noticed and liked about him since the first day we met? Or maybe I could send a postcard to my best friend, for no reason at all, just to thank her for always supporting me.
What holds me — and I think most people — back is the thought of how we would be perceived after performing such gestures. Would we appear old-fashioned or overbearing? The more practical and less poetic of us would argue that we could have just sent a text. What if our recipient leaves us with a short reply that doesn’t live up to the expectations of our heartfelt letter, or no reply at all? This rejection is terrifying.
I find that when we write a letter, we instantly add more value to a relationship. We take the time to sit down, be fully present and think about the person we’re writing to. We examine our feelings towards them and what we want to share with this person. It allows us to be more vulnerable, especially because a letter — unlike a text — doesn’t dwell on banalities. A handwritten exchange is a deep conversation between two people. It takes the bond one step further.
With a regular exchange of letters, I also retain memories of a particular period. Unlike pictures and videos, letters capture profound feelings and thoughts. I remember what I had in mind and what I wanted to talk about, notice the state of a relationship and how it has evolved. It’s romantic, poetic and a way of showing that you care even when you are far apart.
It can also be a fun activity to romanticize your life a bit. It’s time to embrace your inner “Letters to Véra.” When I write a letter, I like to make it a comprehensive experience. I’ve spent countless summer nights writing love letters or scribbling thoughts and observations on my pink writing pad with braids and ribbons in my hair, candles lit and “Baby, I Love You” by the Ronettes playing on my record player.
For the full Sofia Coppola movie experience, I like to seal my letters with an old wax stamp that I bought in middle school and spray each one with my sweetest perfume. You might expect the next step to be mailing them, but to be honest, I’m not quite there yet. Still, one thing’s for sure, if you’ve ever known me, there’s a letter waiting for you somewhere in my room.
