Two years ago, “Slackers” could have been a profitable teen movie to produce. But as it stands now, “Slackers” is a pathetic film targeted at college and teen audiences. The casting and trailers obviously seem to aim in that direction. Given that Freddie Prinze, Jr. isn’t involved, what can possibly be so bad about another “American Pie” copycat? The answer: almost everything.
This hour-and-a-half of wasted time is directed by Dewey Nicks and stars Devon Sawa, Jason Schwartzman, James King and Laura Prepon, all of whom have damaged their careers and respectability with these roles. The movie aimlessly into a predictable direction with contrived sex jokes and a tissue-paper-thin plot: guy meets girl, guy and girl hook up, guy messes up, guy makes up with girl. To get the entire package, just add an infatuated, psychotic dork, two best buddies and a trampy roommate. That’s the whole movie.
For beginners, “Slackers” has an identity crisis worse than someone with a multiple personality. At first, “Slackers” seems to resemble something above the normal teen comedy–something that looks a little smarter than the mindless sex and potty-humored teen movie. The worst anyone could possibly feel after a teen comedy is the slight pain of violation, but not quite penetration. Surprisingly, the film’s structure reduces from junk to total crap, bringing upon the latter form of punishment. The exact point of the landslide is when Sawa’s character and his two buddies begin fantasizing about their greatness in a trippy sequence involving random costumes and spinning lights. At that very moment, a horrible feeling struck. The floodgates of trashy Hollywood crap opened wide.
To prove exactly how contrived the movie is, here is a description of certain scenes contained in the final hour of the movie: 1) The Schwartzman character sucking a 60-year-old’s breasts. 2) The Sawa character getting fellated by the character of King’s mother. 3). Prepon’s character waving a dildo around and masturbating. It doesn’t sound awful, but when you see it, it seems pretty disgusting. It’s not about whether these scenes are inappropriate, but about the lack of comedy and purpose.
Schwartzman’s portrayal of the character “cool Ethan” was psychotic and not psychotic at the same time. Schwartzman plays a great natural-born loser, but his character makes no sense. Sawa is better than Freddie Prinze, but he’s no Ben Affleck. He lies between that line of can’t-really-act-but-looks-pretty and can’t-really-act-but-can-look-serious. James King’s good looks redeem her sorry performance. No one else is worth mentioning.
The best way to explain this movie would be to say that somewhere along the line, the producers decided to make a sappy teen romantic comedy. In order to appeal to the college demographic, they decided to spice it up by adding tasteless sex jokes and a “Cable Guy” angle to the plot. If you don’t think this movie will be that bad, try to imagine sitting through “Titanic” two times. “Slackers” doesn’t even feel quite like that. It feels like sitting through “Titanic” three times, with Celine Dion humming in your ears. D
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