Kids, you’d better invest in some tin foil.
President Westling has denied the Student Union’s request to put enhanced antenna service in the dorms around campus, sentencing us yet again to watch fuzzy PAX or that ghostly image that looks kind of like Kate Winslet, for the rest of our on-campus careers.
“The years that students spend at the University,” Westling wrote the Union, “ought to be an opportunity to reflect on questions that demand more complex consideration than television can provide, and to learn habits of community participation than easy access to high quality broadcasts might undermine.”
Mr. Westling thinks that if we had access to a TV image that didn’t give us a headache to watch, we would stop talking to each other.
Mr. Westling, if this is really your position, then why did you allow the Student Village to get these “high quality broadcasts” that you are so firmly against? Is it because maybe you charge them more money than anyone else? Hmmm.
“Students should take the chance to discuss issues and ideas with people who will often end up being friends for life,” Westling wrote.
Isn’t that sweet? You know what? I don’t think students need your help to make friends. As fun as TV is, socializing is better. Especially when 18-year-old girls live on your floor.
“I do not think we ought to encourage students to unwind instead by sitting silently in front of a television screen.”
Maybe you misunderstand, Mr. Westling, since you probably haven’t been in a true social situation for quite some time, but talking to a new person is not my idea of unwinding. It’s tough to be charming and intelligent, especially around someone you don’t know very well.
Going to class is hard. Reading Nietzsche is tiring. Writing a paper is tedious. I work damn hard, as do most students here, and at the end of the day, I just want to slouch and let my brain fade off into oblivion. Sure, drugs and alcohol work, but TV is better for you. Unless you’re watching “E!”
Here are a small selection of shows that are on TV tonight that BU students will not be watching, because President Westling thinks TV is a waste of their time.
1. On CNN, “Larry King Live,” featuring an interview with the history making wrestler-turned-governor Jesse Ventura, who will be explaining his unique take on politics. Even John Silber should watch; he could probably learn a thing or two about running for governor.
2. On A’E, “Biography” featuring Ted Kennedy, the Senator from, wouldn’t you know it, right here in Massachusetts! Many BU students, especially those from outside of New England, probably don’t know that much about this man, one of the most important people in America, and after tonight’s broadcast, they still won’t, because Mr. Westling won’t let them.
3. On HBO, the best drama on TV, “The Sopranos,” an inspiration to any aspiring writer such as, say, me.
4. On WGBH, the classic 1931 Fritz Lang film “M,” which I’m not going to watch, since I already saw it IN HUMANITIES CLASS! My professor thought I should watch it, but Westling thinks it’s a waste of my time, since I should be talking to my friends.
5. On Cinemax, “Passion Cove.” It might not be educational, but you’ve got to do something if you can’t invite girls over after midnight.
We couldn’t watch Bush’s address to Congress. We couldn’t watch the networks’ botched election night coverage that may have affected the outcome of the presidential race. We can’t even watch a Red Sox game, despite that fact that we live three blocks from the stadium!
What about COM students? There is a major at this University called TV. TV! In order to major in English, you need to read books, in order major in math, you need to have a calculator, and in order to major in TV, YOU NEED TO WATCH TV!
Having cable, or “enhanced antenna service,” would provide another major benefit to the University: the opportunity to create a closed circuit BU channel. This channel would be a boon to BUTV, which would finally have an outlet to air the programs they put so much time and effort into. Our sports and performing arts organizations could air videos of their events. The University could rebroadcast the lecture series they are so proud of. There could even be a channel to carry WTBU’s signal. Other Universities have this, but BU, with its famous Communication school, does not.
Mr. President, I’m glad you’re concerned about the use of our time, but do you really have so little faith in us that you have to take away our TV, the same way my mom did when I was 8 and I got caught hitting my little brother?
For better or worse, TV is part of our culture. It’s an opiate, and sadly, a lot of people around the country waste their lives away on worthless, low-budget entertainment. But in order to relate to people, the people who will some day be our colleagues and bosses, we need to know what is going on in the world. TV will always be a threat, but if we don’t learn to deal with it now, will we ever?
Authority can be a powerful tool, but in this case, it is nothing but a power trip.
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