Best Dressed Film Napoleon Dynamite
Although the irreverently apolitical t-shirt sported by Kumar in Harold and Kumar Go to White Castle makes it a close second, Napoleon Dynamite wins this award. Idaho was a unique setting for the fantastically strange the film, not least because its residents seemed trapped in a morphing time warp – a glorious patchwork of leisure suits, moon boots, do-rags and puffy sleeves. So attired, Napoleon and company were able to fight their respective way through the glorious highs (triumphant dance sequence at school assembly) and devastating lows (dry, cracked lips and no ChapStick).
-Lauren Pabst, Muse Staff
Worst Use of Adrien Brody The Village
A cat-suited Halle Berry was perhaps the most visible performance of dubious judgment by an Academy Award winner this summer, but not to be overlooked was the usually charming Adrien Brody. He wrung all possible depth from M. Night Shyamalan’s The Village as that township’s most mentally unstable resident. Though he began as an intriguing piece of the film’s puzzle; as the story sagged, Brody unleashed some truly terrifying and strangely unavoidable scenery chewing. Maybe Halle and he can comfort one another with some script-analysis/make-out sessions.
-Lauren Pabst, Muse Staff
Best Overt Sexual References in a “Children’s” Movie Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban
As the new director of the third installment of the Harry Potter franchise, Alfonso Cuarón breathed new life into the formerly static series, creating an actual film instead of Chris Columbus’s phantasmagoria of cheesy emotional highs and bright magical whimsy.
Cuarón also brought to the children’s tale a new dimension: a keenly naughty adult humor.
From Harry playing with his wand under a sheet to Ron telling Neville to “stroke it” (the spine of his textbook, that is), the double entendres linger abound.
For the Cuarón fan, there’s even a visual reference to the director’s sexual exploration extravaganza, Y Tú Mamá También.
-Alexa DeGennaro, Muse Staff
Best Use of Hal Sparks Spiderman 2
Undeniably the best summer sequel, Spiderman 2 had everything: Kirsten Dunst simpering on cue, gratuitous naked chest shots of Tobey Maguire, and … Hal Sparks! One of the most brilliant cinematic in-jokes in years, Sparks’ short cameo in an elevator had “Queer as Folk” fans (and maybe even a few old school “Talk Soup” aficionados) giggling amidst a clueless audience that may have missed the significance of Michael the comic book geek getting the lowdown from Spiderman that the Spidey-suit pinches a bit in some places.
-Alexa DeGennaro, Muse Staff
Worst Reason to go to an Ivy League School A Cinderella Story
A Cinderella Story presents Hilary Duff as Sam, a poor diner girl who exchanges secret instant messages and text messages with Austin, her popular Prince Charming, played by Chad Michael Murray.
The lovebirds have no idea of each other’s identities, but they meet online in a Princeton University chat room – the school where they both aspire to matriculate. Why? It turns out when Sam was young, she asked her dad where all the princes and princesses go to college. His reply: “Princeton.”
– Helen Lin, Muse Staff
Longest Dramatic Stares King Arthur
In this movie, King Arthur is suddenly a Christian soldier riding around with his men for 15 years executing duties for the good of England. In his last duty, he meets the infamous Lady Guinevere, and they exchange many long dramatic stares. He must love her, right? So what about Sir Lancelot, who watches the naked Guinevere bathe in the night light? He too, must love her, right? We never know. Between the three of them and the Woads – who look like a poor-man’s of Blue Man group – it’s all intense staring amidst a confusing plotline.
– Helen Lin, Muse Staff
