I was never the most athletic kid in school. Actually, let me rephrase. I was never an athletic kid in school. You always hear about the kid who got picked last in gym class. Me? I was the kid who wouldn’t even get picked.

But man, did I love playing. I loved picking up a basketball and trying to imitate Kobe Bryant’s fadeaway jumper (unfortunately, I ended up looking more like a 5-foot-6 reincarnation of Greg Ostertag) or picking up a baseball bat and practicing Sammy Sosa’s home run hop — I was better at hopping than I was at actually hitting the ball.

I got cut from my high school freshman basketball team because, among other transgressions, I tried to steal the ball from my own teammate. I still maintain that he was a ball hog and that I played tough D, whether it was on my own teammate or not.

So when I got to the esteemed Boston University, home of the Terriers and alma mater of Howard Stern, I had to find a way to play organized sports that didn’t judge me based on, you know, talent. The answer came to me as quickly as tantrums come to Kevin Youkilis: intramural sports.

The best part of the intramural programs at BU is the wide range of sports offered. There is indoor soccer, outdoor soccer and I’m sure if you asked, there would be rooftop soccer. There is broomball, racquetball, volleyball, basketball, walleyball, wiffleball and plenty of other balls. Everyone from Pete Sampras to the kid who didn’t get picked in gym class could find an athletic niche in intramural sports.

Some sports are certainly more competitive than others. For example, there are two levels of five-on-five basketball, A and AA. Unofficially, AA is for players who were good enough to play college ball but decided instead that getting a good degree was most important. To players in that league: I appreciate the sentiments in thinking about your future, but you didn’t have to be so mean about blocking my shot.

Single A is for players who are just looking to have a good time. This is, of course, assuming that your idea of a good time is constantly screaming at officials, the other team and your own teammates in an effort to exert dominance in an intramural league which actually means nothing in the grand scheme of things. It sounds good to me.

The other end of the spectrum of competition would have to be slow-pitch softball. Everyone can play this sport. Even the gopher from Caddyshack could hit a single in this sport.

Even if you can’t hit, the bar for expectations is set so low that the dancing gopher wouldn’t even be able to play limbo under it. You will never hear anything but encouragement from teammates even if you’re slumping. Good thing, too, otherwise I probably wouldn’t get picked for a team in this sport either.

Here is an often overlooked value in intramurals. The officiating is, for the most part, done by your peers. The importance of this is simple. When a call does not go your way, you can throw the largest tantrum known to man with no fear of punishment or retribution. These are kids who are making chump change and don’t care how the game turns out. Intramural officials just don’t want to be bothered.

It boils down to intramural sports being watered-down versions of the real thing. There is the primitive competitive nature in some, and the lighthearted, genuine fun in others. There is trash talk and afterwards, water cooler talk. Best of all, anyone can — like me, attempt to play.

There is a simple joy in winning no matter what your nature is. On the same token, there is an intrinsic disappointment in losing, whether it’s in walleyball or Division I hockey. While there are levels of both feelings, if you are not good enough to play professionally, intramural sports allow you to experience the feelings of winning and losing in a structured setting which you would not otherwise attain.

One year after coming the closest I will ever come to playing a professional sport, I cannot wait to do it again. Some day, I will nail that fadeaway jumper.

Sopan Deb, a sophomore in the College of Communication, is a weekly columnist for The Daily Free Press. He can be reached at [email protected].