When you hear “long-distance relationships,” you probably think about partners separated by hundreds of miles, who fly to each other whenever they can and make time for each other through FaceTime calls and regular updates. But what about platonic long-distance relationships — the ones that are just as hard and filled with just as much love?
Home is where the heart is, and as an international student, my heart is split into little pieces all over the world. I used to see my family and friends every single day, but now my sister lives in Toronto, and my parents, grandparents and closest friends live in Chennai, India.
As much as I’d love to see them regularly, I can’t. I chose to move nearly 8,000 miles away from home to study in Boston. While I absolutely adore my life here, there’s always a part of me that misses being home.
Being far away teaches you a strange kind of balance — you’re constantly looking for ways to grow while trying to keep in touch with your roots. There’s a subtle kind of love in making time for someone, no matter how busy you are.
These long-distance relationships are kept alive by small, meaningful routines: weekly FaceTime calls, tuning in together when your favorite artist releases an album, sending each other endless voice notes about random things that happen in your day or watching movies over Zoom just to feel like you’re still together.
Back home, maintaining the relationship came effortlessly — like sitting together in class, meeting up at the mall or grabbing lunch together every day. Now, maintaining a connection has to be intentional. It’s about scheduling, coordinating availability and making sure no one feels forgotten. The effort itself becomes love.
One thing I make sure of is to always show up for my people. Even from miles away, you can feel when someone you care about is down — sometimes you just know. I listen, check in, send memes and call when they need to talk, and they do the same for me.
With my family, we have a ritual: a long phone call every weekend that turns into two hours of laughter, updates and stories from home. My parents and I have a group chat where we send each other random texts and photos that often turn into long, funny conversations about nothing.
But distance is also a test. Some friendships fade, but others stay. You realize who really values you and who only likes the convenience of you being around. If you truly care about someone, you’ll put in the effort to keep them around. If not, maybe it was never meant to last.
Some of my high school friendships fizzled out — and honestly, I don’t mind. Moving away was an easy way to let go of people I’d already outgrown.
Still, the friendships that last are worth everything. When I fly home, I make sure to see all my friends. We spend hours together, reminiscing about old stories, making new memories and somehow slipping right back into our old rhythm. It’s weird when it feels like nothing has changed when, in fact, it has.
Long-distance friendships can also be beautifully low maintenance. They are the kind of connection where you don’t talk every day, but whenever you do, it feels like no time has passed. You might go months without hearing from them, and then suddenly, they’re blowing up your phone with 50 texts about a dramatic life update you absolutely need to know.
When you were a kid, the worst thing you could think about was your best friend having to move an hour away. You’d worry about them finding a new best friend or about how you’d go on with your life without them.
I cried my eyes out when my sister first moved to Canada. All her life, she was beside me, and now she wasn’t going to be. I vividly remember hugging her at the airport and the two of us bawled while our family stared at us, concerned. Soon, I was able to be with her again over winter break, but even the six months we spent apart were filled with constant FaceTime calls and catching each other up on family lore.
Moving away from a place I lived for 17 years has taught me that distance doesn’t have to mean disconnection. In fact, it strengthens your bonds.
Distance makes you more considerate with your time and words. It makes you realize which relationships give you peace and which ones feel like a burden.
They say distance makes the heart grow fonder, and I’m here to tell you that’s true. Being away from the people you call “home” makes you appreciate the little moments you get with them.
