KIRLAND: Come as you aren’t

So we’re halfway between my Gatsby birthday party last weekend and Halloween coming up this weekend and I’m beginning to wonder- why isn’t every party themed? A theme adds some sort of intangible, beautiful quality to every party. I can’t quite put my finger on the genius of it, but I know it exists. And I have some suggestions to help you spice up your old, boring, tired college ragers.

One idea for a theme my roommates Brian and Austin suggested was what they billed a ’90s Slumber Party’ theme. Yes, we’ve all heard of pajama parties – and some of us have been lucky enough to attend the Boston University Dance Team lingerie parties – but you haven’t heard of a 90s Slumber Party. It’d be like old sleepover birthday parties like when you were a kid and you try to stay up all night. The only difference is that you have a few drinks. Ice cream, lots of sugar and movies like ‘The Sandlot’ and ‘Rookie of the Year’ and ‘The Little Giants’ all included.

If you don’t dig the 90s Slumber Party idea, I suggest a Great Depression Era party. I know this sounds like a bummer, but it’s not. Take those suspenders you used at the Gatsby party and go find a barrel to clip them on. Celebrate the bare essentials of life. Drink moonshine and dance because dancing is the most important thing to do in such harsh times. Party hard and laugh when you think about how much you hated reading – or Sparknoting – ‘The Grapes of Wrath’ in high school.

Now that I’ve been in Boston for a couple years, I think it’s finally time to unveil another one of my ideas: The American Revolution Party. Invite a lot of people you don’t really know and/or like too much and tell them the theme is Old Britain. Then you and your friends dress up like American Patriots, and hilarity ensues. Your playlist would include songs such as ‘Yankee Doodle Dandy,’ ‘America the Beautiful,’ Jimi Hendrix’s version of Star-Spangled Banner and of course, Miley Cyrus’ ‘Party in the U.S.A.’

Okay, so it’s not nice to make your enemies dress up as Red Coats. If you want a less hostile party, I suggest having a Disney party. Call it Disney World or Disney Land. Think about how much fun it would be to have a late-night dance party with girls dressed up as Disney princess hotties such as Jasmine, Pocahantas, Cinderella and my personal favorite – Ariel. You could rock out to jams such as ‘I Just Can’t Wait to Be King,’ ‘Under the Sea,’ and slow it down with songs such as ‘Magic Carpet Ride’ and ‘Can You Feel the Love Tonight.’

You can – and should – theme any party. It’s fun to spend a night in different decades and in different worlds. Yes, parties are times to drink and be merry – but they’re also a time to run faster and stretch our imaginations farther. I believe in themed parties, just like Gatsby believed in the green light.